of secrets and shame

"After Hanna left the city, it took a while before I stopped watching for her everywhere, before I got used to the fact that afternoons had lost their shape, and before I could look at books and open them without asking myself whether they were suitable for reading aloud. It took a while before my body stopped yearning for hers... The feeling of guilt that had tortured me in the first weeks gradually faded, and six months later,my family moved to another part of town. It wasn't that I forgot Hanna. But at a certain point the memory of her stopped accompanying me wherever I went. She stayed behind the way a city stays behind as a train pulls out of a station."

-- The reader by Bernhard Schlink

The reader is a compelling read that arrests your heart with the burst of passion at the opening, and ensnares your mind as the mystery slowly unravels. throughout the book, decisions were questioned, values were re-evaluated, and memories were reconstructed - although you may not find absolute answers to what was right and what was wrong. the protagonist's love for a criminal mirrors the love for a country which has collectively sinned, just as how his inaction to recapture his love and save her from self-destruction mirrors the inaction of the guards at the camp to save the prisoners. and even after the truth comes to light, we as spectacles to the unfolding of events, are not spared from the torment and the haunting memoirs of the characters.

it is not a pleasurable read for me, but it is definitely one of the most memorable ones this year. and despite Kate Winslet's commendable performance, i am far too afraid to watch the screened version now, for fear that the story would be further etched in my mind.