in life, there are no right or wrong decisions, just different priorities.

this year, the following people have been such a blessing to me -

bin, gloria, waiye, weifang, zhuanghui, hernghuei, jingjun, laypheng, yun, edith, sera, janice, vanessa, kelly and qinlei.

christmas is a season of giving, yet i have nothing to offer them except my appreciation, my friendship, and my well-wishes for the upcoming year.

thank you all and have a blessed christmas. :)

there is a crack and it cannot be patched.

there is a stranger in the room whom i cannot recognise, and whose gaze i have been trying to avoid, and whose presence has been bothering me. the stranger had walked in late, sneaked around like a shadow at the back of my mind, and left without any footsteps. before i knew it, a cerberus picked me up and sent me home against my will. i loved being a mirror; i hoped i had been elusive enough.

and the gap between the crack only grew wider.

christmas is coming in THREE days' time and i havent got any celebration plans YET.

somehow i have missed out on so many gatherings that they have all kinda stopped asking me out. this is when i start feeling like i have traded many of my good friends for a wider social network, a heavier workload, and an opportunity to do something which ive always wanted to.

everything comes with a price, and some very costly.

i want to feel the wind in my ears.

i want to close my eyes,

fall

horizontally

downwards,

and know that there will be someone at the bottom of the pit to embrace me.

i know i am allergic to something, but i dont know what it is.

i certainly hope its not alcohol, because ive never had any problems with any forms of liquor, and i drink to relax. i hope its not unclean or polluted air, because that would mean that i would be getting an allergic reaction every other day. i hope its not beef because i love double cheese hamburgers and niu rou chou fan. i hope it IS crayfish and other shell animals, because i can very well live without them. and i hope its not the clubroom (which is by far my biggest suspect) because that is my hideout in school, the shell i can always crawl back to shun the crowd.

my long-term plan is to find out the culprit so that i can stop getting these hives. but for now, i just want to stop the itch.

ohdear, i have been tagged.

rules of the game:
1. post 5 weird/random stuff abt yourself
2. at the end, list the names of 5 ppl who you want next to this and leave a comment,"YOU ARE TAGGED" in their blogs and tell them to read your blog for rules!

so here it goes -
1. when i was young, i seriously thought i could fly.
2. the first time i had a cup of ice mocha, i felt dizzy and nausea for two days. i have abstained from coffee ever since.
3. ive never cheated in a math test before.
4. some of the stuff i write on my blog is imaginary and hyperbolic, but not many.
5. i took an hour to complete this list. its even harder than my term paper.

and now i can have the pleasure of passing this not-so-fun game to bin, yun, edith, kelly and paula.

i refuse to crack under stress.
i refuse to crack under stress.
i refuse to crack under stress.

and yes, i wont let myself.

while i was listening to my player on shuffle mode this morning, i heard the acoustic version of a familiar song:

could you whisper in my ear,
the things you wanna feel,
i'll give you anything,
to feel it coming

do you wake up on your own
and wonder where you are
you live with all your faults

i wanna wake up where you are
i won't say anything at all
so why don't you slide

and i know some of our dearest friends will be home soon.

last night, i was wheezing so loudly that i thought my respiratory system might fail me halfway through my sleep.

it puzzles me when and how all the sneezing, coughing and wheezing started. i hardly fell ill when i was a school-unifofrm-wearing kid; ive never had a history of morning sinuses; i dont have asthma; i always make sure i faithfully finish my prescription of antibiotics; i dont smoke; i drink more than eight glasses of water a day; and i eat an apple a day. but still, i have been waking up to a string of consecutive sneezes, running nose and plenty of rusty phlegm in my throat.

maybe ive caught the colds.